Stories

When I was a little girl, my mother taught me how to use a code word if I was in trouble and couldn’t speak up

As an adult, I decided to pass down a clever little trick to my daughter—a secret escape plan for awkward situations like sleepovers or uncomfortable hangouts. I thought it would be a handy tool for the future, but I never expected her to need it so soon.

Last night, while sipping my evening coffee in the kitchen, my phone rang. It was my ex-husband, Dave. We kept things civil for Amy’s sake, but his voice sounded unusually hesitant.

“Hey, Claire,” he said slowly. “Amy’s been asking to talk to you all evening. She really wants to tell you about her day.”

That was odd. Amy usually loved her weekends at her dad’s and rarely called me. The unease in Dave’s tone only made my stomach tighten.

“Hi, sweetheart! Having a fun weekend?” I asked.

“Yeah! We went to the park yesterday, and I drew some pictures this morning. Oh… I wish I had a blue marker so I could draw blueberries.”

My breath caught. My mind raced.

There it was—our secret word. Hidden among her cheerful chatter, Amy had just said “blueberries.”

It was our emergency code. And I never thought she’d actually use it.

I swallowed, keeping my voice steady even as my heart pounded. That word meant only one thing: “Come get me. Now.”

“That sounds like a great idea, sweetheart. I’m on my way. Just stay put and don’t mention anything to your dad—I’ll handle it when I get there.”

“Okay, Mom. Love you.”

“Love you too, my Amy Wamy.”

A dozen thoughts raced through my mind as I grabbed my keys. What had happened? Why did she feel the need to use the code word? There was only one way to find out.

When I arrived, I took a deep breath before knocking. Dave opened the door, looking tense.

“Claire? This is… unexpected,” he said, stepping aside.

I forced a casual smile. “Just thought I’d pick Amy up a little early.”

“She’s in the living room, drawing,” he said, voice tight. Then, after a pause, “She told me you’d be coming.”

My stomach clenched. She wasn’t supposed to say anything. Keeping my expression neutral, I asked, “Oh? Did she say why?”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “Not really. She just seemed off. I figured maybe school was rough today, or maybe she just misses home?”

In the living room, Amy looked up the moment she saw me, her relief unmistakable. “Mom!” she cried, throwing her arms around me.

She leaned in and whispered, “Dad’s been acting weird.” Then, louder, she added, “I’m ready to go home.”

Dave’s brow furrowed. “Weird? Amy, I’ve just been a little stressed with work, that’s all,” he said, a hint of defensiveness creeping into his voice. “But you know I’d never hurt you.”

I believed him—at least about that. But something had made Amy uneasy, and that was enough for me.

I met his gaze. “Thanks for letting me take her early. We’ll talk later.”

Once we were in the car, Amy burst into tears. My chest tightened. “Sweetheart, what happened?”

She sniffled. “He was yelling at someone on the phone, really angry. Then he slammed the door so hard it scared me. He’s never done that before.”

I reached back to smooth her hair. “I’m so proud of you for telling me. You did the right thing.”

It made sense now. He’d probably been frustrated with a coworker or friend, but that didn’t mean Amy had to feel unsafe.

“Are you mad at Dad?” she asked hesitantly.

“Not mad, just concerned. He might be dealing with something, but that’s not your burden to carry. I’ll talk to him.”

Amy sighed, reassured. “Okay.”

That night, my phone rang. Dave. I picked up.

“Claire,” he started, “I’m sorry. Work’s been rough, and I lost my temper. I didn’t think Amy would hear.”

I exhaled. “I get that, Dave, but she’s nine. She felt scared enough to use our code word.”

There was silence. Then, softer, “Code word?”

“Something I taught her so she could call for help without saying it outright.”

Dave sighed heavily. “I get it. I don’t want her to feel that way. I’ll talk to her. Apologize. I never meant to scare her. Or you.”

Some of my tension eased. “That means a lot.”

The next day, he took Amy to lunch, just the two of them. When they came back, she looked lighter. He looked humbled.

That night, as she kissed my cheek, she asked, “Mom, can we still use the code word when I’m older?”

I smiled, brushing her hair back. “As long as you want, sweetheart. What matters is that you always know you can reach me. I’ll always be here.”

Life Lesson: A simple precaution—like a code word—can make all the difference. It gives kids confidence and a way to reach out when they need help. No matter how life shifts, when we prioritize their well-being, we can still come together where it counts.

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